Dear FedEx,
I needed that textbook YESTERDAY. So here I am, textbookless, about to fail a pop quiz all because you couldn't do one teeny tiny thing for me. You're just hoarding all this priceless knowledge so you can watch me be a failure and laugh in your little white van . Well Guess what FedEx, I am not going to take it anymore! No I'm finished with you and this emotional abuse. When you do finally bring me my textbook, which will have been rendered useless and outdated because I'll be a THOUSAND YEARS OLD BY THEN, I'm just going to chuck it back in your face.
Love,
Jordan
(not.)
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